Saturday, March 5, 2016


Five days into march.

We've already had to reschedule moxie's 3 month check up, after her last CT scan, because the doctor we were seeing and really liked, is leaving the practice. this appointment may decide if we will continue to drive to waltham for 'check ups' when we have perfectly capable doctors just a few miles away. she was also due for her annual shots and whatnot and got a clean bill of health. i think we will always sound stuffed up and nasally now...but now she just sounds like a normal pug, i guess.

tap is the most amazingly fun thing i've done in a long time. i'm sure it helps that the class is run by a friend from early derby days and 2 of the other 3 students are my close friends, but whatever the reasons, i love it. we are looking forward to continuing on, but i, of course, am forced to decide how to divide my precious free time. no, i know i am not the only person in the world who has to prioritize social engagements and things of that nature; but, i am not the type to fill my schedule to the max and be okay sacrificing my 'me' time. my days must include a couple hours of alone time or i will go insane. especially on work days when i wake up to 8 hours of human interactions that sometimes make me want to question why we don't have sterilization laws.

car parts are flooding in. i have (i think....i hope) the stuff i need to get the suspension and brakes back on and in order. that will have to wait until tap ends in a few weeks, so i can devote full days to working on it. if you're at all curious about that project, i have a separate blog to chronicle the madness, here.

still not getting much skating in, these days. missing derby because of it, but i'm sure it's just because i want to skate...not necessarily get back into that scene. next warm day, i must get out on the trail or park. this crazy new england weather is so back and forth, as winter makes way for spring. 50 degrees one day to snow showers the next. and it seems, no matter how warm the air, it has been so blustery that the cold wind isn't terribly encouraging for outings (for me, anyway).

back at (mostly) my 6-day workout weeks. it's nice feeling like i'm getting back in shape again...sweating away all my troubles. well, most of my troubles.

relay stuff is also keeping me busy. i just wish i could think of another way to raise some money, outside of the team events. but, i just don't have the time i had last year and i feel like i'm back in the non-creative swing of life. that part of my life cycle where i look at my studio and think, 'ah, hell. i'm just gonna sell off all my supplies and stop pretending i have time or desire for this hobby. it would free up a whole extra room of the house if i cleaned it out, too...could be my new dance studio.

but, of course, my mind changes so rapidly and frequently that i don't dare make a move.

Saturday, January 30, 2016

January 30...

...and how far have i gotten on my list?
well, I'm 18 days (today) into my quest to return to the habit of working out, daily. they say 21 days to make something habit. once i get there, then i'm not free and clear, because i also read that it takes 30 days to make that habit a 'lifestyle'. the good news is that i've switched back to a workout program that i have proven to work for me. I love doing it and look forward to putting that dvd in and getting my turbofire on. Just to up the ante, i've decided that 'i want to fit into that dress again' is not really enough motivation for me anymore. i don't really have trouble buying a bigger size if that's the one that fits (i do have trouble spending money on clothes, in general, though, so fitting into the stuff i have is so much more appealing!). instead, i've put my mind to running a 5k in march. a physical goal that i will actually be proud to achieve.
speaking of health, our little old lady, Moxie, got a clean bill of health at her follow up appointment.
her tumor (shown as the shaded area in her nasal cavity in the picture on the right) blocked all of her right nostril and most of her left! as you can see from the picture on the left, all the black area in the center of her face is her clear nasal cavity. side note: i love her giant bug eyes!
she never got sick or weird during her treatments, and since the tumor has shrunk (just a tiny bit is visible, when the doctor showed us the scan farther back into her skull) she is back to puppy mode! she sleeps while we're gone and then just wants to play all night. yes, this little chapter in our lives cost us a pretty penny, but how could a person not find a way to save their baby? totally worth not getting a tv without tubes and seriously cutting the alcohol budget!

and speaking of budgets (wow my segues are really working out for me today!), i'm still focusing as much time as i can on getting the Barracuda running. (here's the link to that blog, if you have no idea what i'm talking about)

oh, speaking of sister and a good friend of mine are going to see Heart this summer, at the melody tent!! i would LOOOOOVE to have the car fixed to drive us to the show, but we'll see how quickly things move once i'm actually putting parts back on the car. sister...she has convinced me to take a trip to Detroit again this summer. that's 2 years in a row. it's becoming tradition. this time we're going to see some Detroit Derby Girls roller derby action! yay.

ooh...skating...there's a new park in Chatham that is tiny, but sooo smooth and a promising little venue for a silly day of fun. we went to check it out on a day when the temp was 29 degrees and colder than that with the windchill. there were ice patches all over the concrete. it was the day i finally got up the nerve to go down a ramp! after several trips to various skate parks, i finally got the thrill of careening to certain death. but i didn't die. instead, i kept my knees bent, back flat, and let the ramp in front of me slow my speed as i did a very ungraceful little transition out and back onto the ...ICE!!! i didn't die.

not a great segue here...except these girls i skate with are still (and always) fighting the good fight against way of volunteering and raising money. also this summer, i'm taking part in the Relay for Life again, with my Rogue-Bot pals. we have a country line dancing event planned for later this month. we're all saving our bottle return money. we're begging our friends and family for donations. Jen's giving doggie baths again, this month. we're planning, hopefully, to do another event at the red nun in D-port again, since they were so gracious to let us set up there last year.
more on all that later, as details are finalized. but, if you're interested in helping, here are some useful links:
our team page (where you can donate or even join us!) plus my PERSONAL page (last year, my friends helped me raise about $800!! i'd love to blow past that, but i'm still shooting for my initial $500 goal)
the line dancing event page
our facebook page, to keep in the loop of future fundraising events
jen's dog washing event (get details here)
any donation helps. simple shares with your family and friends helps. joining us for our fun events helps.

Saturday, January 2, 2016

January 2, 2016

here we are! into the new full day in the books.
we had a super relaxing day. so relaxing that i was asleep by 7...even though i didn't have to be up for work this morning. Moxie never really cares though. she's up for food as soon as it seems like someone (namely, me) is stirring. of course, once i'm up, i'm up. she can fall back asleep, with her full belly, and get up again around 9 or 10!
so here i am. back at the ol' computer, killing the wee hours of the morning. current time: 4:21 am.
but let's focus on the positive.
yesterday was just about the most perfect weather for January 1. cold. breezy. sunny.
we met up with a couple of my very best friends and walked Coast Guard Beach out in Eastham. surfers were out. people were walking their dogs. once the wind died a bit, i even saw a woman in her beach chair, planning to spend a fair chunk of time soaking up some rays (face only, she was still pretty bundled up).
Eastham, Ma: january 1
then we decided, since we were already out that way...and it was nearly noon...that we'd hit Guapo's for some mexican food and cocktails (for me and hubs, anyway). 
the rest of the day was pretty lazy. i was going to rake the leaves up from around the carport, but i just didn't want to. instead, we just hung out. watched speed racer and i colored a little. really lovely day.

Today, i'm spending the morning with my mom. she's headed back to michigan on tuesday, and i'm back to work tomorrow, so it's our last chance to hang until the next visit. and we never know when that might be. and we have to get her to the beach before she leaves!

here comes some honesty. i previously stated somewhere that i was going to try harder this year to focus on one or two things and let the little things kind of fall into place wherever they can or will.
but that's just not who i am. why in the world did i think i could just be okay with that? on the very first day of the year, i decide that my organization and focus is going to start with binders or notebooks for my major projects or goals. so, first thing's first...what are my major projects or goals?
welcome to the new year, first list!
list of 16 things to accomplish this year. not bad...considering probably half of them should've been done years ago. and probably a quarter of them are kind of on-going lifestyle changes. leaving me with a list of about 3 or 4 major projects/goals. not bad! but those few things take up a fair chunk of time. which means, on top of the 'project' binders...i'm going to need a separate notebook (or planner) to schedule which project gets how much time, which days. which means, i'll also need to schedule time for scheduling! i wish i could be the kind of person who just goes from moment to moment and says, 'oh, hey! i think i'll go work out!' then 'i feel, at this very moment, that i'd like to go fix that treadmill!' or 'mmm...that lunch was great! now i can't think of anything else to do...i'm gonna go convert my front drum brakes to disc!'
all this stuff needs scheduling for me to get any of it done! including eating!! 
i've never not been aware of how ridiculous it sounds...but it's who i am. it's how i must live. and even knowing it...i manage to not get shit done. 
more truth: i get the most joy out of making the lists...not actually crossing things off. and there's the problem with my system.

but aren't we all, always and forever more, works in progress? 

Wednesday, December 30, 2015

2015 is winding down

Here we are at the end of another year.
my 41st year. of this life. on this earth.
each year, i tend to add on more things i'd like to do in the new year. which leads to me saying to myself, 'what are you thinking? you'll never succeed at anything if you start everything all at the same time!'
so i think this year, i may try to cut to the chase and try to focus on one thing (okay...maybe one big thing and a couple smaller things?).

SPOILER: none of my goals are to capitalize or properly punctuate my blogs. sorry. 

my problem: i don't ever feel like i'm getting older. sure, my knees hate stairs. my hair is sparkly with greys. my weight loss efforts get more frustrating. but i have a 12 year old dog that acts like a puppy. i don't have kids that continue to grow older to remind me that I, too, am growing older.
so here i sit, looking forward to my 42nd birthday in 2016, feeling like i never passed my 25th!
but it's not a problem, in the traditional sense of the word. it's just a problem when i make my list of goals, and then consider the timing. so the list has to be edited and edited and edited, with each new year. (honestly, primarily because i lack focus and ambition)

now, keep in mind, that this is still my personal blog. it may not mean anything to you...or, maybe some posts speak to you while other posts leave you scratching your head thinking 'who the eff cares, you weirdo!?'  But whatever your reason for reading reason for writing it is to keep myself sane and centered (in theory).

so what do i actually want to do, to make the most of 2016? 
well, i'd like to focus most of my energy on getting the Barracuda running (that's a whole other blog that has gotten very little attention these past couple years, sadly). that'll be my one 'big' thing.
i've also had success with my quilled jewelry over this past year. while all my profits this year have gone to charity, which warms my heart, i'd like to maybe keep a little for myself...using the momentum from the charity craft fairs. this is where my focus really needs to be stepped
of course there are the personal goals of taking back control of my weight and fitness routines...actually getting myself to field hockey, skating more, working out and running again would all be helpful.
 i'm still interested in learning icelandic...and brushing up on my french...maybe finally learn russian...
there's tap...
and here we go...
the list just gets longer...
new year's resolutions are just reminders of how old we're getting!

so what have i learned with my stream of consciousness?
that i will just have to go about my business as usual, trying to be more ambitious and better at time management, while my main goal in life will remain:
to be a good person

and on that note:
give blood!
go HERE to link to the facebook event page for the blood drive at the Orleans Animal Hospital on January 8.

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

What's a 'Rogue-Bot'?

Just a quick little post today to relay my gratitude. 
Since leaving roller derby in February, I have had a little extra time on my hands. oh, let's be real...i have a lot of extra time! Not only that, but I have 2 amazingly giving friends that I gained from that chapter in my life.
And, the three of us have the best time just trying to be good people. 
These days, instead of trying to come up with practice drills and safety policies, i'm back to crafting! And the beauty of that, is that i can take my art and turn it into money for charity.
My friends and I formed a little group. A lot of people are confused by it, and it's a little bit of an inside joke, but mostly it's just silly... like us.
Let me explain:
we joined derby.
we each had our own experiences with it, but seemed to have a common bond that just got stronger as we struggled with our individual derby journeys. 
Things happen and people talk...I always used say 'we went rogue' when people questioned our opinions and actions. but sometimes you believe in something so strongly that you must do what you feel is right. 
our thought was simple: think logically and don't take anything too seriously or robots.
thus, we dubbed ourselves 'Rogue-Bots'
and then we had my hubby draw us a logo for our silly group of do-gooders. (that's logical, right?)
Our goal is to be a positive force in the communities in which we live. It's just the logical thing to do.
we're not going to change the world, but we will continue to do good where we can.

In fact, as we have our team set up for Relay for Life (Midcape), we had a very successful fundraising event this past saturday. That came the day after our impromptu gig as charity gift-wrappers at Barnes & Noble. Between the two events, we were able to raise over $500 for the American Cancer Society!

now, this is something i would not have done if i had never met these two amazing friends of mine.
it's sometimes crazy when i think about how a life can change just by a chance meeting.
it's a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world...and i'm a better person because of it!

Saturday, November 21, 2015

still just rolling along

I'm not ashamed to say that i have been listening to Christmas music and watching terrible made-for-TV Christmas movies. as i mentioned before, I have crafts to get done. and when you're making snowflakes, holiday music helps get you in the mood.
as for all the stuff i need to make and get done, i think the IFAW thing may be off the list. haven't heard about it and hubby says he's not sure it's going to happen this year. I'd still like to get stuff done, for my etsy shop...even though i get so little traffic there, it seems silly.
The meeting in Provincetown was a success! 
Womencrafts on Commercial street currently has a few pieces of mine, for the rest of the year. Hopefully they get some positive feedback and call me this spring for more stuff. They are only open on weekends, now...if you're out there when they're open, go in and see how it looks in person! you'll also find some pottery by my friend Susie, of Wink pottery! she was my push into the brick & mortar game.
here's a sample of what i dropped off. 
(the finished product hangs on silver fish hook earrings)
My awesome Rogue-Bot Rollers Relay for Life team is also busy getting ready for the craft fair. All proceeds go toward our fundraising efforts for the 2016 Relay. The American Cancer Society gets all the money raised. It'll be the beginning of my individual efforts...last year i was able to collect about $150 from jewelry sales! I'm hoping to at least match that this year. I'll have my fun paper snowflakes and some new pieces of jewelry. And I played around with some miniatures this year...
I'm not really sure what to do with them, except sell them individually. They'd be cute additions to gift wrappings, i think. so come snatch a couple up before they are gone! 

We finally got to Fairhaven for a rink skate. 
It was freaking mobbed with teens and tweens. 

Kraut couldn't make it because she had family in town. and Tart & Slam didn't skate...Tart has an eye injury and Slam was not feeling it...they came along for support and as our chauffeurs! I finally got to skate with Renee's beau. and hubby skated with me...well, he was there...trying to skate as fast as he could. I'm more of a 'let the music move me' skater. it was a ton of fun, but it'll be even better when the group is all healthy and together again and skating on a quieter night. looking forward to that!

and Thanksgiving is still on it's way. no stopping the holiday rush around. 
just found out a little while ago that mom's coming out for Christmas. and Auntie is headed to London at the start of December. family Christmas eve will be a little different this year. but with hubby's new car and moxie's little health issue this year, there will not be gifts i can put all my efforts into the one swap gift. no searching for this, that and the other thing...just one thoughtful $20 gift. I'm actually kind of excited to shop this year!!

so, make sure you come out to the Dennis Senior Center on Saturday, November 28 between 10 am and 2 pm! get some handmade gifts (jewelry, pottery, knitted get the idea) and help fight cancer, all at the same time!!
here's my personal fundraising page, if you feel like donating now.
and, here's my TEAM page if you'd like to join our team, or make a donation to the team, in general.
(thank you)

Wednesday, November 4, 2015

i am the girl of 100 lists...

no Iceland blog today. I think I covered most of the trip in the last 4 blogs. That doesn't mean i don't still think about that trip every day. My facebook feed is full of Iceland...i follow at least 3 pages, so that I can see it's beauty daily. And, also take notes for the next trip.
so what's been going on since I've finished combing through my 100's of pictures, and reliving that glorious time away from the hustle and bustle of life?
well, I'm back to the hustle and bustle, of course.
I decided, during that time i could collect my thoughts, that I needed to realize that my life is not really moving. I go to work, I do random things to keep myself busy, and i hang out with the dog and hubby when I can.
but is that living?
since quitting roller derby nearly a year ago (February, i think i made it official?), i've had a ton of time freed up.
I have a few things i could fill that time with...
but then suddenly...
i'm strapped for time again!
the end of the year is jam-packed. 
it's like there was a set number of holidays we needed to have in a year, and they weren't spaced out properly so we just threw a bunch in at the end. like when you're making your 'YARD SALE' sign and you started too far to the right and 'sale' is all mashed and illegible. well, i feel like the end of the year is like that...all mashed up.
so here i am ...wanting to do too many things, while also having that list of things that still needs to get done.
a couple friends and i finally found a few hours on a Saturday morning to get out and roller skate. It was a beautiful and unseasonably warm November 1. I took a digger at the very bottom of a tall hill. there was a patch of thick sand at the bottom and my wheels stopped, while my body continued its forward motion.
my lucky day! 
i managed to skate away with a few scrapes and a couple sprained fingers. i did not hit my face or bite my tongue or break any bones. it was a good day!
It makes my quilling a little more painful, but i have a meeting on Thursday and a craft show at the end of the month. plus the IFAW holiday bazaar next month.
I got my work schedule changed to free up Wednesday mornings so i could stay out late and play field hockey with some friends Tuesday nights. last night was to be my first try. i bailed to try to get some work done.
already i can see a pattern of coming up short on time. 
i also turned down an invite to skate this morning, because i can't afford the temptation to not get stuff done today!
what's so important? 
i mean, how much time could i possibly need to just sit and do paper crafts all day, right?
well, i have some momentum going on my car project, too. I need to take advantage of the nice weather to get my shed cleared out (which means extracting mice) so i can have room to work on the back axle this winter. I have a friend helping me, so i have a list of stuff to get going on. and, without a heated garage, i need to get outside and under the car while the 50-60 degree days are still upon us. (unfortunately, also good days for skating. but that just means we'll have to plan some off-cape rink time, soon)
Thankfully, the Tuesday trips to waltham for Moxie's radiation appointments have ended until the scan in January.
For now, I can cross 'write blog post' off my list and get to work on the rest.
Dirty work, first.